oF dAuNTInG wALLs

Her name is Teresa but everybody calls her T. T because she insisted on it and would not answer if called otherwise. Plus, it’s cool and easy to remember. Unlike Teresa it’s easy to pronounce, especially for her shosh back in shagz. I have a hard time describing T. This is where I would most probably ask you to close your eyes if I was making a presentation. But at the moment, I can’t. Imagine a chicken bbq pizza with lots of toppings, I hope you aint reading this when you are hungry. The pizza is yours to eat. You pick a slice, it’s your first slice. You have been craving for pizza for so long. Now open your mouth, you are supposed to salivate right now, but you don’t. hold up, we need a back story to explain why.

So your brain is tired and fed up since its lunchtime. It has been dating your stomach for some time now. But like most new-into- the-relationship couples, they had a disagreement in the morning. Their first disagreement, and it was messy. Messy to the point that you threw up your breakfast this morning. Thing is, the stomach suspects that the brain is cheating on her with the lungs. Last night the brain came home smelling of a strawberry cologne. It’s only the lungs that wears that cologne on Fridays and Saturdays. (be a cooperative reader and lets just pretend that you do shisha). she had all the reason to raise hell, and honestly the stomach is a bad bitch. So the fight ended up with the stomach giving up breakfast back to the mouth and the brain stayed hungry. To retaliate, the brain decided that it wouldn’t release saliva for smoothening you’re eating process. Now Sir mouth is at a standstill. He cannot function without saliva yet he really needs to bite in. The little bird Madam right eye has told him of the tasty meal that awaits him. It all boils down to revenge, without saliva the stomach won’t get food and the brain will have equaled the fight. But the brain is rational. It thinks ahead. There is no reason picking a fight with a lady, a lady is always right, and again he doesn’t want to sleep alone tonight. It’s so cold out there with all the neurons on a go slow. So finally it decides to release the saliva.

This drama takes about five seconds. Now you bite in. The taste is a description of T. she’s foreign yet sweet. Foreign since her actions are not normal. She is the type that uses words like substantive to describe how her day was. She doesn’t follow the cardinal rules of punctuation. A T sentence looks like this, i Am lErAniNg mAnDaRIn. Crazy, right. Sweet since she always does good things that make you aww. She’s the kind who would save her lunch and give it to the street kids in Globe Round About. Her motto is to do good before good goes bad. I don’t really know the meaning of this phrase. But it really doesn’t matter. Everybody is free to live by any mantra. Mine is, sleep is bae. It never breaks my heart nor makes me sad. I crave for it so much. I think am addicted to it. We all are to some extent, but my addiction is on another level, you feel me.

I know you are craving to know how T looks. Well, I hate to disappoint you. We aint doing that now. Instead, let’s bring in a twist. Our twist as you have guessed is a dude. His name is Jared. He aint called J nor Jay, just Jared. Unlike T, Jared is a cup of coffee. If you are not a coffee fan, then I am really sorry. You won’t relate. Jared is a coffee latte with three spoons of sugar. Now the thing about a coffee latte is that it knocks you off your feet. Jared has the same effect on ladies. He’s the guy with the looks and the walk. His voice makes you feel as if you in heaven. I aint kidding about this. I have heard it. He aint tall. Neither is he short. Just medium with a medium build. Nothing out of the ordinary, and believe me this is what makes him stand out. He’s the guy you look at, then walk, then look back again and make changes to your first impression. He confuses people and he knows it. He never confused her, it was the opposite.

They met at Archives. Archives is to Nairobi what Times Square is to New York. He was waiting for his mum, and she was waiting for her roommate. He first noticed her legs. Her legs are those kind of legs that make you care about legs. I wouldn’t describe them, just know that they confused him. She had a gothic look. Black everything, from her make up to her tank top and leather mini dress. Her black boots completed this look. Thing is, T is sort of a rebel. And her gothic look is an act of rebellion. She doesn’t want to be or do the ordinary. Why would I eat lunch at one or two? why should I wash my cup first before my plate? She’s that kind of person. You would not use the same word to describe her face and Ariana’s face. But it was something close to it. let’s say Ariana’s is at 95%, then T’s is at 80%, not bad.  Her eyes, that’s the next thing that caught him. Please don’t tell me you are thinking that they are almond green or something foreign. Nope, they are black and big. Big in a good way. Big in a way that made Don’t call me J more confused. He had to talk to her, and talk he did.

Let’s fast forward a bit. She fell for him. They did what normal couples do in the movies. They had an awkward first date, they kissed on their third night out in front of T’s gate. They got busted making out in Jared’s room. She bought him a boxer pack for valentines. He took her out on a candle light dinner and broke her virginity after that, blablabla. It’s boring right, shit we’ve seen but most are yet to experience. A cutout movie presentation to make love look out of the ordinary. Actions that make us men less romantic. Actions that dictate and sometimes shape our relationships should be. Actions that hold us against the ground of better relationships. Okay, lemme stop. I feel like this needs a whole story. Let’s just focus on T and Don’t call me J.

I love twists, let’s bring a new twist. She is called Mercy and ooh Lord, she never had Mercy. I am just kidding. I just felt that that particular line rhymed. Mercy is, okay, I am not sure if she still is, her roommate. Not the other roommate that T was waiting for the other time when he met Don’t call me J. I feel like this also needs a back story. Relax it won’t be that wild as the brain and mouth story.so T is in UoN. She is a 3^rd  year BA student majoring in English and linguistics. What happens in UoN is that you keep on having different Roommates every semester. This is if you stay in the school hostels. so it was a new semester and T had this new roommate.

Mercy is a freshly baked cup cake, she is small and leaves you craving for more.  Unlike T, she has a figure. (I am not being sexist here, I hope you get what am saying) It’s not hour glass perfect, but it has the same effect on dudes, bulging eyes, bent necks and worst case scenario, bonners. They bonded at first site. She was homely and T loved that about her. She cared. She cleaned her cup after use. She never sat on T’s bed. She did not bring noisy friends around. Most of all, she was clean. She was the perfect roommate. They hanged out most of the time. Don’t call me J, was in KU and only visited on weekends. So most of the time, it was just Tand Mercy.

T fell in love. It wasn’t with Don’t call me J though, but with Mercy. She felt like Mercy understood her more. They could talk without saying a word. Laugh at things nobody else understood.  Mercy at most times knew how she felt.She would know when to eat Matumbo or chapo nyama, unlike Don’t call me J who was always taking her to stool and kioo restaurants. it is as if his main goal in their relationship was to make her fat.

She wants to tell Mercy about this, but she is afraid of what she might say or do. She is afraid of rejection. She’s afraid of losing Don’t call me J too. She doesn’t want to be alone. What she aint afraid of though is what the world would think about her when she hooks up with Mercy. She’s a free spirit, but even free spirits hit walls that they can’t penetrate. And mercy is T’s wall. She wants to go through her but doesn’t want to break her. She can’t go over her since the feeling is too strong to get over. It’s either she speaks out or she speaks out. It will kill her if she doesn’t. last time I checked, she was gonna make the move, I really dunno if she did.

My Space.

So my words finally came back , hurrah . I am happy . Watch out for my next post to know how they decided that I’ve been lonely for a long time. Anyway , thanks for reading , you are a champion for getting to this point . Please do share , there’s somebody out there that needs to know that her brain and stomach are dating😉